John Gushue . . . Dot Dot Dot

Fans

"You have your fans, I have mine. Some day, your fans are going to work for my fans." 
- Alex, the brainy middle child in the Dunphy family on Modern Family, to her older sister, explaining how she charmed the local nerds. 

Onion goggles

From Modern Family's episode this Thursday:

Jay: What the hell are those?

Phil: Onion goggles. No more tears when I cook. Welcome to the 21st century! You should get a pair.

Jay: I was going to suggest the same thing.

Manny pulls the plug

My favourite line from last week's Modern Family involved Manny, just after he disconnected the karoake machine that caused sonic torture. (It helps to know the line is said to his aging stepdad, Jay: "You keep this up, and this won't be the last plug I pull."